I'm Infertile?


Oliver was born 2 months after our first wedding anniversary and because of this, we assumed that having baby #2 would be no problem whatsoever-until I was diagnosed with secondary infertility. At the time, I had never even heard of that term before. You mean, you can have a child, and then be diagnosed as infertile? News to me. Bad news.

And so the series of tests began which revealed nothing remarkable. Exploratory surgery was next to determine if scar tissue from my emergency C-Section with Oliver was to blame. My husband went off to have testing done as well and therein we found some worrisome results that could have been preventing pregnancy. And all along, as the testing and doctors were moving forward, I was already unknowingly pregnant! Guy and I found out the day after we decided that whatever was discovered, we would not pursue any kind of fertility treatments. We trusted that God had a plan, that children were a gift and a reward, and that we would trust His will for however many babies He thought was best for us.

When I now look at all 3 of my beautiful sons, I think back to that time before they were born, to the days when the dream of a large family was suddenly shrinking, and I consider how good it felt to rest content in the knowledge that God is Sovereign. That’s still true today, whatever the circumstances of our lives.

I hope that someday, my little knights will understand how much joy and excitement went into our prayers and dreams for them and how blessed we are to have them for our sons. But even more so, I hope that they can learn from us that even when life does not turn out the way you planned, that resting in God’s Sovereign timing is always the best plan of all.

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